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When Someone Very Special Dies: Children Can Learn To Cope With Grief (Drawing Out Feelings Series)
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A practical format for allowing children to understand the concept of death and develop coping skills for life.

Series: Drawing Out Feelings Series

Paperback: 32 pages

Publisher: Woodland Press; Reissue edition (July 23, 1996)

Language: English

ISBN-10: 0962050202

ISBN-13: 978-0962050206

Product Dimensions: 11.1 x 0.1 x 8.6 inches

Shipping Weight: 5.6 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)

Average Customer Review: 4.7 out of 5 stars  See all reviews (29 customer reviews)

Best Sellers Rank: #48,756 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #77 in Books > Children's Books > Growing Up & Facts of Life > Difficult Discussions > Death & Dying #559 in Books > Children's Books > Growing Up & Facts of Life > Friendship, Social Skills & School Life > Emotions & Feelings #3694 in Books > Children's Books > Literature & Fiction

Age Range: 9 - 12 years

Grade Level: 4 - 7

I researched for many days every book avalable on this subject, as my husband left me a young widow at 26, dying very suddenly and tragically of a brain annuerisym in the middle of the night, beside me in the car - two weeks before Thanksgiving. Although I am cursed that I have not been left with our own child, he did leave behind several nieces and nephews profoundly attached to him; he was the most loving and adoring man toward children, much like one himself, which is why they loved him so...... so I knew when he died, looking at their faces they simply could not understand, - let alone cope or come to terms.... to make matters worse, the rest of the family demanded I not cry or show emotion in front of them - "Don't upset the children"...... what a terrible mistake. Hiding your emotions from such delicate and tender minds teaches them to hide and be confused about their own feelings.It was so painful for me to not only lose him, but feel I could not have or give support to those who suffered with me.I had to find some way to intervine, because I knew in my heart and soul the way the children were being treated - excluded, hidden away, avoided, not even spoken to or allowed to be present during the many gatherings of his hundreds of friends who came to visit over the week, etc.... was detrimental and only causing them more harm and hurt...... So I sought to do the only thing I had any power to in the situation, since my own position was not respected or honored in the family (THEY BLAME ME FOR HIS DEATH, BECAUSE I "SHOULD HAVE KNOWN SOMETHING WAS WRONG" I "LET HIM DIE" and I "DIDN'T GET HIM TO THE HOSPITAL OR GET HELP IN TIME".) So much anger - and that is what the children saw...

Learning to cope with difficult emotions is a most important achievement for young children who are experiencing grief from some form of loss. The experience of death needs an adequate explanation using correct terms and simply stated definitions. When vague terms are used, children become confused. When children are given the opportunity to ask questions and to express feelings of grief through physical and creative activities, they are able to develop healthy coping patterns that will continue through adulthood. When Someone Very Special Dies, Children Can Learn to Cope With Grief, written by Marge Heegaard, is a book intended to help children move through various levels of grief through the use of writing and drawing their own illustrations. This workbook's presentation is a valuable tool to be used by children through a confusing emotional time. Throughout the 32 pages of narrative prompts and partially drawn black and white illustrations, children are able to actively participate in a concrete and personally reflective experience. Children are encouraged to explore curiosities about death by asking questions, and they share personal understanding through the use of writing and creating their own illustrations. In response to grief, children may display a spectrum of emotions often acted out because they are unable to clearly express feelings verbally. Through the use of supportive prompts, children are coached in choosing ways to express anger or fear in a way that doesn't hurt other people or animals, or themselves. Children are encouraged to use suggestions on how to use physical movement and exercise to avoid the stuffing of feelings, which over time can cause severe physical ailments.

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